Monday, September 30, 2013

8 months gone...

It has been 8 months since I became separated from the man I loved. So much has happened in these months that I do not know where to begin. All I can say is that everything I knew then or was told then was an absolute lie. He never intended for us to always be family. As soon as his girlfriend was on the scene he became increasingly hostile towards me...and surprisingly towards her as well. As it stands now I was forced to leave a home that I loved because of his absolute selfishness and I am now living with my three children in a camper. Soon we will have housing but that isn't the point. He promised to always take care of us, the kids and I...he has not done so. It no longer angers me that he didnt love me anymore, mostly because I found out I really didnt love him. It took no time at all for my heart to heal and be ready to let him go. I am so much stronger and happier than I ever thought I could be on January 27,2013. I literally thought I was going to die. I wanted to die. I couldnt imagine being without him. In truth I couldnt imagine being on my own. But I am and I have my three gorgeous babies with me. I do not have to deal with his rages and anger. I do not have to deal with him treating me like a piece of trash. I am free. Of him and his crap. So very free. It is a wonderful feeling. His girlfriend on the other hand is dealing daily with his anger and mood swings, having things thrown at her and having her heart ripped out day after day. He treats her so much worse openly than he ever treated me. They are 8 months into their love affair and she is so defeated. Karma? Perhaps. Maybe it is just a case of "be careful what you wish for because it might just come true".  I do know this, they are not soulmates as they claimed to be. They will not be together forever. One of them will go to far and the other will break. And I will go on with my life raising my kids and being happy and free.

1 comment:

Music lover said...

I just discovered your video "reach into the darkness". Incredible. Youre very creative and emit natural charm. Your story is heartbreaking. God bless you and your children...